The Perils of Perfectionism: A High Achiever’s Curse.
As part of my coaching, I like to delve into the intricacies of personality types. One common trait stands out among lawyers: being high achievers. We proudly wear this badge, but beneath the surface lies a paradox. The very behaviors that drive us toward success can also become stumbling blocks. Do you resonate with the archetype of the classic high achiever?
For those who excel, there's often a hidden struggle:
Perfectionism: While striving for excellence is admirable, it can lead to paralysis or burnout when standards are impossibly high.
Overcommitment: Saying no becomes a challenge, resulting in an overwhelming workload that compromises both quality and well-being.
Difficulty Delegating: The reluctance to hand over tasks leads to micromanagement, hindering team efficiency despite the desire to maintain control.
Workaholism: The relentless pursuit of success may result in neglecting personal relationships, hobbies, and self-care, taking a toll on mental and physical health.
Imposter Syndrome: Despite accomplishments, a lingering fear of being exposed as a fraud undermines confidence and satisfaction.
Lack of Work-Life Balance: Prioritizing work over personal life can lead to feelings of emptiness, despite professional success.
Risk of Burnout: Constantly pushing for excellence without adequate rest can result in burnout, impacting performance and well-being.
Perfectionism, in particular, plagues many high achieving lawyers. This is something I have often struggled with in my career. Lawyers often spend excessive time refining every detail of legal documents or courtroom arguments, fearing any mistake could jeopardize their case. If you are an associate, the idea of a partner finding a typo in your work is mortifying. As a result, you may spend excessive time on simple tasks. This never ending meticulousness leads to extended work hours, heightened stress, and delayed deadlines. Ultimately, it's a recipe for burnout.
We also tend to think that everyone remembers every mistake or misstep but that just is not true. We are definitely our own worst critics. The truth is that no one is looking at your work as closely as you are. Is it possible that you are not being realistic in your self-appraisal?
Workaholism is also a challenge I have faced in the past. While you are busy being perfect, you can fall into the trap of spending so much time working that you have no time for a personal life. Don’t fall into this trap! It is important to make plans with your friends and family and KEEP them! I can’t tell you how many times I canceled plans to work late. Sure, sometimes there is a real deadline that can’t be helped but too many lawyers cancel their plans indiscriminately. Eventually, no one will be waiting around for you if you are consistently an unreliable friend or partner. I strongly encourage you to take a hard look at your own habits in this regard. Do you make and keep plans for your personal life or are you too willing to sacrifice your own happiness?
To navigate these challenges, it's essential to cultivate self-awareness, set realistic goals, practice self-compassion, and seek support when needed. Sometimes, a coach can provide valuable guidance to help you harness the benefits of being a high achiever while mitigating the negative impacts.
When overwhelmed by perfectionism, remember to slow down. Step away from work and engage in activities that ground you. Whether it's stretching, exercising, or connecting with a friend, prioritizing your well-being is essential. After all, you can't deliver your best work when you're overwhelmed.
