Finding Balance: Overcoming Overwhelm in a Busy World

In today’s fast-paced and hyper connected society, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by the constant demands of work, family, and personal commitments. Between emails, social media, over scheduled calendars, and client meetings/calls, the pressures of the legal profession can exacerbate stress, hinder personal well-being and lead to burnout. As a coach, I work with my clients to explore practical strategies for managing stress and finding balance. This blog post is just an insight into some of the strategies that have worked for me and my coaching clients.  From mindfulness techniques to time management tips, I provide actionable advice to help you regain control and maintain your well-being. Whether you’re dealing with daily pressures or facing significant life challenges, I hope this blog helps you discover some ways to cultivate a calmer, more centered approach to life’s demands.

Understanding Overwhelm and Its Impact

“Overwhelm” is a state of emotional and cognitive overload where we feel unable to cope with the demands placed upon us. For women attorneys, this can stem from high-stakes cases, demanding clients, long hours, and the added pressures of personal life. Recognizing the signs of overwhelm—such as chronic stress, fatigue, irritability, and a sense of helplessness—is the first step toward addressing it.

The impact of overwhelm affects your physical well-being, leading to issues such as headaches, sleep disturbances, and weakened immune systems. Professionally, it can impair decision-making, reduce productivity, and diminish job satisfaction. Personally, it strains relationships and diminishes the quality of life. The physical and mental toll is tremendous. It also becomes somewhat of a vicious circle. You can’t sleep and then you are more tired the next day. Rinse and repeat and this becomes your daily lifestyle. Understanding these effects underscores the importance of finding balance. 

Mindfulness Practices to Handle Overwhelm and Stress

There are a couple of practices that have really helped me to manage the feeling of being overwhelmed.  Mindfulness is the practice of being fully present and engaged in the moment. It helps reduce stress by promoting a state of calm and clarity. For busy professionals, mindfulness offers a respite from the constant mental chatter and anxiety that often accompany demanding careers.  My first introduction to mindfulness came through yoga and I am a big devotee of yoga as a stress reliever. Even if you don’t have time or interest in picking up yoga, you can still benefit from a mindfulness practice. Here are three ways to start with a mindfulness practice. 

1. Breathing Exercises: Take a few minutes each day to focus on your breath. Inhale deeply through your nose, hold for a few seconds, and exhale slowly through your mouth. This practice can help calm your nervous system and reduce stress. You can simply count your breaths. Count to four and breathe in. Hold for four seconds. And breathe out. Repeat this for several minutes. 

2. Body Scan Meditation: Lie down or sit comfortably and focus on different parts of your body, starting from your toes and moving up to your head. Notice any areas of tension and consciously relax them. This practice helps you become more aware of your body and reduces physical stress.

3. Mindful Walking: Take a short walk, paying attention to the sensation of your feet touching the ground, the movement of your legs, and your surroundings. This simple practice can help you feel more grounded and present. Sometimes when I walk, I intentionally count items to help me focus. I list five things that I see or hear. Just the practice of actively scanning your environment brings a calming reset and distracts your mind from the constant chatter and to-do lists.

 If you are new to these mindfulness practices, you might think about using a recording or app on your phone. I am a big fan of the Insight Timer app which is free and has hundreds of mindfulness practices like the ones I describe in this blog post. Incorporate mindfulness into your daily routine by setting aside dedicated time for practice.  You might plan to do one of these practices as soon as you wake up (instead of rolling over and looking at the phone on your nightstand). Even five to ten minutes a day can make a significant difference. 

Time Management Tips for Busy Professionals

At the same time that you deploy some mindfulness practices, you can also look at improving your time management skills like prioritizing your tasks and creating a realistic schedule. Effective time management begins with prioritizing tasks. Use the Eisenhower Matrix (named after President Eisenhower) to categorize tasks into four quadrants: (1) urgent and important, (2) important but not urgent, (3) urgent but not important, and (4) neither urgent nor important. Focus on the tasks that fall into the first two categories. You will surprise yourself by how many things aren’t really that urgent or important compared to other items on your list.  At the same time, take a hard look at your calendar.  You have to carve out time to be organized and allow yourself time to be productive.  For years, I have blocked off my calendar at lunch time so that no one can schedule anything with me then. I use that time to actually eat, walk, go to the gym or meet with a friend. I try to never work through lunch. It is a bad habit and one that I see many people consistently doing. You  need a mental break. I find that I am much  more productive after lunch once I’ve had time to “reset”.  When you try and create a realistic schedule, think about these tricks for managing your time: 

1. Block Scheduling: Allocate specific blocks of time for different activities, including work tasks, meetings, personal time, and relaxation. This helps create a balanced schedule and ensures that important activities receive adequate attention.

2. Task Batching: Group similar tasks together and tackle them in one go. For example, set aside specific times for checking and responding to emails rather than doing so intermittently throughout the day. This approach reduces distractions and improves efficiency.

3. Time Blocking: Reserve chunks of uninterrupted time for focused work. Turn off notifications, close unnecessary tabs, and create a distraction-free environment to enhance productivity. I like to time block Monday mornings and Friday afternoons so I can use those times to organize and focus on clearing out my emails. I also block my calendar from 8-9 each morning so I can organize my day. Somehow an 8 am meeting can completely throw me off. 

Getting control over your calendar is a form of boundary setting and setting boundaries is crucial for maintaining balance. Communicate your availability to colleagues, clients, and family members. Learn to say no to commitments that do not align with your priorities or that you cannot realistically manage. Respecting your own boundaries helps others understand and respect them as well.  If you start blocking off your calendar at lunch time, you might get a lot of push back from your colleagues, but encourage them to take breaks as well. I do have an exception, I will agree to a lunch time meeting if someone wants to buy my lunch. 

Physical Well Being

Once you start your mindfulness practice and get control over your schedule, you are on the right path to fighting overwhelm. You might also add in some other strategies for well being.  Lawyers notoriously do not take care of themselves very well. We are so busy fitting everything into our day that we overlook our biological needs. Paying attention to your body and diet can make a big difference in how you feel and how you manage stress. 

1. Regular Exercise: Incorporate regular physical activity into your routine. Exercise reduces stress, boosts mood, and improves overall health. Whether it’s a morning jog, a yoga session, or a dance class, find an activity you enjoy and make it a priority.

2. Healthy Eating: Maintain a balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains. Avoid excessive caffeine and sugar, which can exacerbate stress. Staying hydrated is equally important for optimal physical and mental function. Several years ago, I drastically changed my diet and stopped eating processed carbs.  I found that it completely eliminated afternoon sleepiness that I had been struggling with for years.  I have heard people say that they similarly get a boost and focus from morning fasting.  It is an odd discovery to realize that wrong food is impacting your mental alertness.  

3. Adequate Sleep: Prioritize sleep by establishing a regular sleep schedule. Aim for 7-9 hours of quality sleep per night. Create a relaxing bedtime routine and ensure your sleep environment is conducive to rest. Most lawyers sleep with their nightstand on their phone and check emails before bed and upon waking up. This is a terrible habit for your mental health.  While we might pride ourselves on our diligent work ethic and availability, you are not doing yourself any favors by doing this.  

Emotional Well-Being

Lawyers pride themselves on being self-sufficient and hard workers but it definitely takes a toll on your emotional well being. You need to make sure that you are not working so much that you isolate yourself from others. Our relationships with family and friends are critical. Social support is essential for emotional well-being. Make time for meaningful conversations and activities with loved ones. Don’t be the friend that is constantly canceling plans because of “work” obligations. If you do, friends will eventually stop including you in plans.  You can’t maintain relationships without spending time and keeping commitments. It doesn’t work if the relationship is constantly secondary to your work priorities. It is ok if there is something big happening at work, but don’t constantly use work as an excuse to neglect your relationships. 

Another thing that can really help you reflect on your emotions and relationships, is journaling. Journaling is a great practice to force yourself to reflect and acknowledge your emotions and thoughts.  If you are resistant to the idea of journaling, try just journaling about gratitude.  Regularly reflecting on positive aspects of your life can enhance your mood and outlook.

If stress becomes overwhelming, consider seeking support from a mental health professional. Therapy or coaching can provide valuable tools and strategies for managing stress and improving well-being. The legal profession has one of the highest depression, addiction and suicide rates or any profession. Again, I think that our self-reliance is a frequent problem for women attorneys and keeps us from asking for help.  Don’t fall into that trap.  Just a few sessions with a therapist or coach can help you gain clarity on the root cause of your struggles. 

Creating a Balanced Lifestyle

1. Work-Life Integration: I think we are all tired of the phrase “Work-Life Balance”. Instead of striving for a perfect “balance” between work and personal life, I find it more realistic to aim for work-life integration. Identify areas where you can blend the two seamlessly. For example, if you enjoy working out, schedule a noon workout to break up your workday. It will be easier to fit that in now that you have blocked your lunch hour on your calendar. 

2. Flexible Work Arrangements: Flexible work arrangements peaked during Covid, and most law firms and companies are still allowing some flexible work arrangements such as remote work, flexible hours, or compressed workweeks. Flexibility can significantly reduce stress and improve work-life balance. I have often told associates that they should leave early in the day so they can attend their kids sporting events and have dinner with their families.  It is easy to log back in to the computer in the evening and regain that time after your children are in bed. 

3. Pursue Hobbies and Interests: Make time for activities that bring you joy and fulfillment outside of work. Whether it’s painting, gardening, reading, or playing a musical instrument, engaging in hobbies helps recharge your mental and emotional batteries. These are the things that go on the back-burner when we are busy because we think they are not important. But having time in your schedule to “play” is so important. Spend some time reflecting on the things you used to enjoy doing. And, if you find you don’t have any hobbies, it is time to find some!

Cultivating a Calmer, More Centered Approach

Once you get a handle on the stressors causing you to feel overwhelmed, you need to nurture yourself on a continual basis and take the time to pause and evaluate how you are feeling and how you can improve your physical and emotional health. 

Embrace Imperfection

One of the keys to overcoming overwhelm is embracing imperfection. Perfectionism often leads to unrealistic expectations and added stress. Recognize that it’s okay to make mistakes and that not everything has to be perfect. Focus on progress rather than perfection.

Adopt a Growth Mindset

Cultivating a growth mindset can help you navigate challenges with resilience and optimism. Embrace challenges as opportunities for growth and learning. View setbacks as temporary and solvable rather than insurmountable obstacles.

Practice Self-Compassion

Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend. Self-compassion involves recognizing your own suffering, understanding that it’s a shared human experience, and responding with kindness rather than self-criticism. We are own worst critics.You have to change the way you talk to yourself (that could be a whole separate blog post).

Develop a Morning Routine

Start your day with a positive and calming routine. This could include mindfulness practices, exercise, journaling, or simply enjoying a quiet cup of coffee. A structured morning routine sets a positive tone for the day and helps you feel more in control. The main thing to remember is not to roll over in bed and start looking at your phone. Let your brain wake up gently and ease your way into the morning. Think about getting up just 15 minutes earlier to take time for yourself.

Conclusion

In a world where demands and pressures are ever-increasing, finding balance and overcoming overwhelm is essential for maintaining well-being and thriving both personally and professionally. By incorporating mindfulness techniques, effective time management strategies, and practical well-being practices, you can regain control, reduce stress, and cultivate a calmer, more centered approach to life. Remember, achieving balance is an ongoing process. It requires regular self-reflection, adjustment, and a commitment to prioritizing your well-being. As you implement these strategies, be patient with yourself and recognize the progress you make along the way. With dedication and mindful practice, you can navigate the complexities of your busy life with greater ease and resilience. Finding balance isn’t about eliminating all stress but about developing the tools and mindset to manage it effectively. Embrace the journey of self-discovery and growth, and empower yourself to lead a fulfilling and balanced life.